[personal profile] aragarna
Title: The Fatherhood Chronicles - A Son, by any Other Name
Author: Aragarna
Characters: Peter, Elizabeth (Peter/El)
Genre: angst/comfort with some fluff thrown in. episode tag, missing scene, gen.
Spoilers, warnings: up to 6x06. Mention of the canon death of a canon character.
Word count: 666
Summary: tag to 6x06. For Peter it never was about taking down the Panthers, it was about giving Neal is freedom.
Author's Note: Continuation of Peter's journey through fatherhood. Thanks to [livejournal.com profile] kanarek13 for continuing to hold my hand.


A Son, by any Other Name

Peter hangs up the phone and sighs.

Why can’t they just let it go? He won’t accept any promotion. It just doesn’t feel right. They took down the Pink Panthers, one of the most notorious gang of thieves in the world. They’re celebrated like heroes around all the divisions at the FBI. Peter accepts the handshakes and friendly accolades, but his smile is crackled. His heart isn’t at it. Because for him, it never was about the Panthers. It was about giving Neal his freedom. Setting him free, and giving him a well-earned second shot at life. But Neal didn’t get any of it. Neal is gone.

He keeps receiving phone calls from the White Collar division in DC. They’re trying to lure half of his team. Diana accepted a position. Which is fine, she deserved it, and she’ll be closer to her family. But Peter can’t help feeling a tiny heartache. It really feels like the end of something. At least Jones is staying. Now that Peter is stepping back from the field, Jones is becoming the real driving force of the division and, to Peter’s satisfaction, he’s been doing a great job so far.

With Jones, the team is in good hands, and Peter doesn’t worry much when his alarm reminds him he has to go home. With everything that happened, it has been easier that Peter thought it would be, to change his work habits. These days, Peter’s main source of happiness is his family and its promises of a future still to be built.

A second shot.

--------------------------------------------------

The baby isn’t even born, and yet he is already bringing his share of wonder and joy into his parent’s world.

One night, Peter is brutally awakened by El shaking his shoulder. Worried, he turns around in the bed to face her.

“What’s wrong?”

“He kicked!”

Peter tries to shake the fog of his half asleep brain. “What?”

“The baby, he kicked,” Elizabeth repeats. This time, Peter catches the delight in her voice, and he eases a sigh of relief.

He cuddles around her and she grabs his hand to put it on her round belly.

“I don’t feel anything,” Peter whispers.

“Be patient.”

“Maybe he went back to sleep,” Peter suggests.

Just when he’s about to withdraw his hand, Peter suddenly feels it. A light kick. It’s not much, barely noticeable, but Peter feels overwhelmed by a tender joy. The baby is right there, so close. Out of sight, but alive.

“How does it feel?” Peter asks Elizabeth.

“It’s a little weird, having something inside, that you don’t see, but you can feel moving. Kind of like Alien.”

Peter chuckles and caresses Elizabeth’s belly.

“It’s also a little magical,” she adds.

They remain entangled together. As he thinks about the future, a thought crosses Peter’s mind. It’s furtive, uncertain. He’s not sure it’s a good idea. But somehow, it appeases something inside of him.

“Hon,” he says, tentative, “what if we changed the name of the baby?”

Elizabeth turns around to face him. He can read in the concern of her beautiful eyes that she has understood.

“You really think it’s a good idea?”

“I don’t know.” He’s not sure. But now that the thought has formed, he can’t get rid of it.

“It’ll be his name his entire life. From his birth, like in twenty years.”

“Yes.”

Elizabeth remains silent for a while. “You’ll have to promise me you won’t try and see Neal in him. This child has nothing to do with him. He’s you and me. Not a friend he never knew.”

Peter swallows the lump in his throat. “I know,” he says in a low voice. “I promise.”

He wants to explain, but he’s not sure he understands himself. He never really considered Neal his son. Not really. Yet, it feels right. Neal will continue to live with them, through their little boy, and Peter will give him the life Neal never had.

And this time he won’t fail.



To be Continued....


The Fatherhood Chronicles masterpost

Date: 2015-01-17 01:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scarym1.livejournal.com
Oh I love this series. :) It is funny with El waking up Peter in the middle of the night -

“It’s a little weird, having something inside, that you don’t see, but you can feel moving. Kind of like Alien.”

and so sweet with Peter asking El if they could name their son Neal.

Date: 2015-01-17 02:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lov-pb.livejournal.com
"Peter will give him the life Neal never had." Oh... so sad.
Very nice.

Date: 2015-01-17 02:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] reve-silencieux.livejournal.com
*sniff* Oh, that was a painful one. I knew it was coming, but it still hurts. Poor Peter. I'm glad you touched on the accolades but it doesn't mean anything to him. And I'm so glad to see someone tackle the scene where they decide to name him Neal. Because as touching as it is, it IS a hard burden to bear, for everyone. Lovely fic, and I can't wait for some fluff now!

Date: 2015-01-17 02:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
awww Thank you!! :)

Date: 2015-01-17 02:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
Thank you! :)

Date: 2015-01-17 02:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
{{{hugs}}} thank you!! ♥♥
Yes it's a bit hearbreaking. I have a hard time thinking about what it did to Peter.
I promise the next one will be pure fluff and love :)

Date: 2015-01-17 07:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sheenianni.livejournal.com
This is lovely. It has to be so hard for Peter to be praised for the one case that killed his friend - but at least he finds comfort in his family.

And heee, baby kicking :D When my mom was pregnant this last time, the five of us would hover over her to feel the baby kick. Sometimes I'm amazed she didn't kick us to give her a little space :D

Date: 2015-01-17 08:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pipilj.livejournal.com
This is lovely story. little things like enjoying the babies first kick, which first time parents enjoy enrich your story tremendously. Poor Peter with so much regret. Love the reason for naming the baby name.

Date: 2015-01-17 11:42 am (UTC)
leesa_perrie: two cheetahs facing camera and cuddling (Peter 2)
From: [personal profile] leesa_perrie
Oh, so sweet and sad and lovely all at the same time! *hugs Peter*

Date: 2015-01-17 03:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eldorah.livejournal.com
Aww, such a sweet moment. I love this.

Date: 2015-01-17 04:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
Thank you !!

LOL your poor mom. ;-)

Date: 2015-01-17 04:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
thank you!! ♥

Date: 2015-01-17 04:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
awww thank you !! :)

Date: 2015-01-17 04:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
Thank you ♥♥

Date: 2015-01-17 06:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ultracape.livejournal.com
This is such a beautiful series. I love how it was not about taking down the Pink Panthers for him. It really wasn't as he was always ready to drop it each time he thought it would put Neal in too much danger.

Date: 2015-01-17 06:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
awww thank you! ♥
Yes, Neal's freedom was definitely more important for Peter than anything.

Date: 2015-01-18 12:33 am (UTC)
kanarek13: (Default)
From: [personal profile] kanarek13
Awwww *heartbreak* And beautiful at the same time because yes, Peter will make sure that at least their Neal has the perfect life.

Love the Alien bit, lol.

Date: 2015-01-18 12:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dennih23.livejournal.com
*hugs* Peter – getting the recognition he deserves but doesn’t want. He misses Neal so much.

The baby kicking is simply wonderful. Peter is going to be such a good father. Finally Peter asking El if they can name their son Neal. Little Neal is going to be spoiled and loved tremendously.

Looking forward to more of little Neal Burke and his adventures – thanks for sharing this.

Date: 2015-01-18 02:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
Thank you ♥♥

Date: 2015-01-18 02:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
awwww thank you!!
More will come I promise. :)

Date: 2015-01-18 09:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ocmiss.livejournal.com
Oh the end was heartbreaking, but so beautiful. Poor Peter :(

Date: 2015-01-19 02:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aragarna.livejournal.com
thank you! ♥

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